2013-03-21

Cognitive Dissonance Vs. Paranormal Activity


Morgan Griffin
Eng111
Prof. Jami Blaauw-Hara
2013, March 7th                                 Cognitive Dissonance and Paranormal Activity
                When discussing dual beliefs, paranormal activities and beings are a great place to start. What is a more questionable topic then the afterlife? People have questioned it, pretty much since there have been people to question it. How much does one personally believe, though? Would you go as far as saying that you believe in ghosts? Or are you one to put reasons behind why something out of the ordinary had just happened? How far do your dual beliefs go?       
                                                          What Is Cognitive Dissonance?                                                                                                                                      
                The dual beliefs I discuss, are called ‘cognitive dissonance’. Which is the idea that two beliefs can be held simultaneously, usually under the circumstances that one belief is uncomfortable to deal with to whoever is dealing with it. This idea is a theory of Leon Festinger’s (1951). The theory itself is a dual belief, as cognition (thought) and dissonance (feeling-often that of dread) are competitive ideas. Paranormal activities, of any kind, would set this theory into motion for most people.             
                                                          My Personal Experience
                Personally, I have had experience in the area of paranormal activities, so I know quite a bit about dual beliefs. Being a member of a paranormal club here on the NCMC campus, ones beliefs seem to come in pairs of how you feel and then later on if you can explain how you felt about an event and you can come up for the reasoning behind it. When I explore ‘haunted’ places and something unfamiliar to me occurs, I immediately try to come up with what it is-before saying that it’s a ghost or something. Other things we have yet to explain, and I do believe those to have been paranormal activity sightings. We’ve had our flashlights turned on and off, hair that has been lifted to a certain angle (looking as though it is being pulled), and even at one point I myself felt as though I was being strangled by a force that I could not sense other than force’s touch. On the other hand, the buildings we visit obviously have to be older and so we are able to label all the other noises to that alone. So the footsteps one person might hear out in the hallway and immediately it’s thought to be a ghost- no, you would be hearing the hallways creak due to the deteriorating floorboards. The shadows on the walls/floors have also been able to be explained, due to the fact that one of our locations has low-lighting and the other doesn’t have electricity at all, so the fire we light often plays tricks on our eyes.  
                                                          Other Member's Experiences
                Other members of the group I belong to have experienced similar occurrences. My boyfriend said that at one point he’d felt a little hand on the back of his leg, rubbing it as though it were someone (a child’s height) looking for his attention. Some people have said that they feel when a certain room doesn’t give off ‘the right feeling’ and then they immediately would like to leave. Unfortunately though, we have also noticed that those who tag along with us and are critical members of the team, don’t often have anything that happens to them.                                                  
                                                           Equipment We Use                                                                                               
                As far as equipment goes, when we go on our hunts usually we have a backpack or two full of equipment for paranormal investigations. We use 3 different recorders, to try and pick up any vocalization made of the ghost’s part. We often carry 4 or 5 flashlights on us when we go to the Onaway location, because the house we go to doesn’t have any form of electricity. We use the dowsing rods, as we ask questions, and then we have the ghosts answer them through the rods. As skeptic as some people may be, that technique actually works. We carry 2-3 cameras, and take between 100- (and at one point) 900 photos every outing we go on. We continue to take pictures, even though we already have pictures of all of this, just because we go over every inch of every photo looking to see if we pick anything up. So when we do, the picture will go under group inspection as we all try to come up for reasoning beyond the straight up assumption that it is a ghost. Also when we go to Onaway, we will most often carry a second backpack full of warm gear such as gloves, hats, scarves, extra layers, etc. The house there has one source of heat and that is the fireplace on the main level of the house.  So far, we have been able to have suspicious activity with all of our actual paranormal team equipment though.                     
                                                           In The End                                                                 
             Both events we can explain and events we cannot explain have occurred, but while I am a member of a club that deals with things that are paranormal, I don’t think I will immediately say that there is no such thing as a ghost. As I mentioned before with the afterlife, we’re not really sure what really goes on when one dies. Anything is possible; we could follow the religious beliefs and go straight on to awaiting for judgment and wait for God to send us to either heaven or hell. Then again you could also say, that while we wait we linger around either loved ones or places we loved (or spent our lifetime at). Nothing can definitely be said about whatever awaits the living when they pass. We could die tomorrow, and possibly end up being ghosts and haunting poor innocent people at a place we once enjoyed spending our time. So no, I do not immediately turn down the idea that ghosts or other paranormal beings exist.

2013-02-24

Giving Up

I give up. I give up trying to be what everyone wants me to be. Sometimes, I feel like I should give up on things like caring too. Nobody cares about what I say or do. In fact, I was told just the other day to go die... as it would do the world some good. I don't remember how we got to that stage, but she was able to walk away from the conversation, and I couldn't. I stood there, wondering if it would do the world some good if it were without me. I was so hurt. I took my frustration, and continuous worry out on the world that day. I hurt one of my friends verbally, and said some things I rather wish I hadn't... only out of the fear that upon saying them I have now lost that person's friendship. I have spent the past two days wondering how I have fallen so far from what I once was, or how I am able to continue to fall. I want a second chance at life, but it doesn't seem to be able to happen. Instead I hope for it, and life gets worse. In that perspective, I give up trying to make it better. I won't look to people for help, as they won't give it. For now, I do feel like I have to rely on myself or get hurt worse. The funny thing is, is that nobody notices or cares. I won't ask them to either. As one can tell, reading this, I am still angry. Angry, sad, and scared.

I am also 4 days away from my 18th birthday. Yet, 1 month before I am leaving. Closer to a year, before I can leave all of this mess behind and not have to look back.

2013-02-19

English 111 Assignment-Finally!


Eng 111                                                                                                                                                                   Morgan Griffin

Prof. Blaauw-Hara

2012, February 15th                                               Blogging to Change the World

                When considering that which is the best route for a child’s education, one should consider homeschooling. With some top academic records, and great reports on the child-Einstein’s who have appeared in society after being homeschooled, have given on-lookers a wonderful impression of just how awesome homeschooling really is. I am here to tell you, that homeschooling (like everything else) has its pros and its cons.              

                                                                                Jean Anyon’s Work

                Recently, I read a piece of work by Jean Anyon. She’d done some research on the schools and how the different social classes affect them. Basically, that the higher social class had a better version of a public school than that of a lower class. Higher class schools, or the executive elite schools, featured things that enhanced a student’s abilities to learn. They had things like open-ended questions, project-based activities, and a sense of independence. Whereas, the lower class schools pretty much taught the students how to survive in the lower class. Based upon Jean Anyon’s work, I feel the homeschooling is another form of an executive elite school.

                                                                                              Public School                                                                                                                           One of the more popular academic choices that parents tend to choose for their children is public schooling. Sometimes, it is due to the fact that both parents are working and don’t have the time to consider better education alternatives. Others do it to give their child the ability to interact with other kids. The latter really shouldn’t be considered when it comes to education. As documentaries, like PBS’s Waiting for Superman, have featured the growing issue- our public schools are failing. That our students in the public school system are not getting the proper attention they need for their education. The economic crisis is something to be considered, in the education dilemma. If the economy continues to go downhill, then our ‘executive elite schools’ may not be so elite for much longer.                                                                                                                                                                                 
                                                                                                              Homeschooling                                                                                                       Now when it comes to homeschooling, I have a completely different perspective. Even with a crisis, like the economy, homeschooling is a safe route to ensure your child’s education is still safe. My parents considered all of these details before homeschooling me. Another one of their reasons to homeschool, was that they were protecting my siblings and I from hazardous topics that are popular in the school system. Such as drugs, sex, alcohol, bullying, and other things that students go through. The nice thing to factor in, is that the parents themselves ensure that their child is being properly educated. My mother was the one who taught my siblings and I all of our subjects. She sacrificed our happiness, to properly educate us. Unlike the usual public school schedule with hours that go from 8am to 3:15pm, my schedule (at one point) had hours from like 6am to 6pm. Instead of equally balanced time frames for classes, our core subjects had the most focus. Things like art, music, and time to exercise all had short but sweet periods in our schedule. If we didn’t accomplish what we needed to in the core subjects, we wouldn’t move on to the subjects we loved to do until our work was done. It was easy for the teacher, my mother, to see where we were messing up personally and fix the issue right then and there. Higher grades were easier to achieve, and fortunately helped a homeschool student like me to enter college with just enough knowledge to want more and to eagerly be willing to learn.                                                                                                                                                                               Conclusion
Although public school has its benefits, I find those of homeschooling to be better when it comes to considering children’s academic success. Both have their cons, which parents should take into their own perspective as to which of those they can deal with. Through homeschooling the worst can possibly be the lack of research done in it. With much enthusiasm, I support homeschooling. Yet, I know others who think public schooling is the best choice out there (even after considering homeschooling). It really is in your own matter of personal opinion where you choose to place your faith for your child’s education.

2013-01-22

The Daily Balderdash

Hey y'all,
So I haven't posted in FOREVER and I do apologize.
So your daily entertainment for today, I will post below.
Your daily song- I picked the very romantic song ♫I Won't Give Up♫ by Jason Mraz
Then your daily movie is the Splice- the 2010 thriller/horror movie. If your into aliens, this is the movie for you.
Anyways, must get back to my busy life!! :)
Hope y'all had fun.
Thanks for reading!!!

2012-12-20

Daily Balderdash- 2 Days Worth

Missed a day! Gosh, what's wrong with me? Lol, well here is a makeup post.
Daily question (sorry I only have one of these) WHAT ARE YOUR THREE MOST IMPORTANT VALUES? Well, first I'd have to ask what values this person was looking for. If I had to answer what top 3 things I value most in my life they would probably be my family, my friends, and life.
Songs- 1. Can't be tamed by Miley Cyrus
2. Summertime sadness by Lana Del Rey
Movies- anything Christmas-y= pick 2 of 'em.
Have fun! I know I will! Today is my bday!!!

2012-12-18

The Daily Balderdash

So lately I have posted I ton of crap.... daily questions, songs one should listen to, movies you should watch, and blah blah blah. So now... I have decided DAILY I will post one post of all of this.

So.....
Your daily question is......DO YOU HAVE GOOD FRIENDS? The answer to the is YESSSSS!!!!! I love my friends. I have amazing friends.
The song y'all should listen to is.....Rabiosa by Shakira featuring Pitbull. Great song to put on and dance as wild as possibly.
The move y'all should watch is..... The ABC Family Movie Cyberbully with Emily Osment. This movie definitely relays the importance of what one does on the internet. The only spoiler-like thing I will say... is that it is SOOO easy to find yourself crying with this film. I did, but I cry really really easily.
Something to think about doing... is Sign Up for a fun run, 5k, 10k, half marathon, or marathon.

Anyways that's your daily balderdash..... enjoy!!!

2012-12-17

Daily Question

Today's Question is
DO YOU THINK ABOUT HOW QUICKLY LIFE GOES BY AND REALLY LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST?
My answer is yes. I think about life all the time. I tend to live in the moment, but I don't feel as though I am living my entire live to its potential.

2012-12-16

Daily Question To Think About & My Answer

I just got this app on my IPod, that gives a daily question to think about. From now on I will post them, and my answers to them. Feel free to comment with your answers.

Today's is-
IS THERE ANYTHING YOU HAVE GIVEN UP ON IN LIFE?
My answer is, yes- trying to make the world happy. No matter how hard you try, you can't please everyone.

2012-12-02

More Depressing Poetry

I wrote this during my 'beauty battle'. I hope... in some ways, it helps show what I was going through.





I Will Survive 
Tonight, I'm gonna cry myself to sleep. 
As it has become the only thing that comforts me.
The world has become a miserable place, were no one tries to understand or wants to understand. 
I've entered the world with a clearer image as to what it is.
I pray I do not have to endure it long. 
If I must, I shall, but at what cost?
 
Tonight, I am gonna hug myself. 
This distorted body of mine. 
I will hug it as I harm it. 
Harm it for not being beautiful.
Harm it for being average.
 
Tonight, though, I will survive.
Survive because that is all I have left.
Survive and pray that maybe this hell is a temporary situation. 
That maybe there is a heaven here on earth.
Maybe, I still have time to find it.
 
I will survive. I will survive.
 
 
 

2012-12-01

Music for your ears...

In my last post, I wrote about a current struggle I have. In this post, I want to share a playlist that I made to force myself to be strong. I react strongly through music, so this was extremely helpful to me. Here is 25 songs off of my playlist.

1. Face Up by Lights
2. Runaway by Mat Kearney
3. You're Not Alone by Kate Covington
4. Falling by Florence and the Machine
5. Mad World by Gary Jules
6. Bring Me To Life by Evanescence
7. Keeps Getting Better by Christina Aguilera
8. Wonderwall by Oasis
9. Personal Jesus (Radio Edit) by Marilyn Manson
10. Hard To See by Five Finger Death Punch
11. Helena Beat by Foster The People
12. Savior by Rise Against
13. Perfect People by Natalie Grant
14. Hero by Chad Kroeger ft. Josey Scott
15. You Gotta Be by Desree
16. Bother by Stonesour
17. Suicide by Rihanna
18. Black Roses Red by Alanda Grace
19. What Goes Around by Justin Timberlake
20. Thought Of You by Ryan Woodward
21. Scream With Me by Mudvayne
22. Not Afraid by Eminem
23. You're Not Alone by Meredith Andrews
24. So Alone by Anna Blue
25. Born To Die by Lana Del Rey

2012-11-30

The Beauty Battle

One of the saddest battles I have ever witnessed is the 'Beauty Battle'. One of the saddest things I have come to witness in that, is anorexia. Although I struggle with eating myself, I don't think I am quite as bad as some of these poor girls I have seen. I am definitely not saying I am anorexic either. Tonight, I am writing this, hoping that someone will read this and pass on this story to someone who is. Maybe together, we can help bring 'Ana' to her knees and save the lives of mislead girls.

I started starving myself when I thought I would have a better chance at getting a boyfriend. I wanted my 'Prince Charming'. Looking in the mirror every morning, I saw this fat and ugly girl staring back at me. I was working part-time at a hardware store at the time, and I didn't realize how quickly my world could fall apart. I would be able to go 2-3 days at a time without food or water, and still keep up with how highly physical my job was. I weighed easily 160 pounds before I started, and weight loss had begun due to work alone. By the time I quit, I was down at 120 pounds. The longest time I went without food or water, was 4 1/2 days. Only because I realized that if I fell asleep, my hunger pains disappeared. I felt powerful at the start, knowing I could control myself to that extent. I didn't need food, and I could be pretty. Then my critical side came back... and 120 pounds didn't look skinny enough to make me look pretty. Starving came back. Yet, it took longer to lose the weight. The second period of time I starved myself, I was healthy. Starving myself actually did feeling like I was starving. I spent nights crying myself to sleep, worried that I wouldn't ever be 'girlfriend material'. This struggle took up a lot of my time. Worrying about eating, not eating. I lost a lot of my friends over that time, as they gave up on me. Bruises appeared on my body. My back, hips, arms, legs and I wasn't actually doing anything physically harmful. I did find a boyfriend. He hurt me more than I was hurting myself. Upon finding out that I wasn't promiscuous enough for him, and that he was cheating on me, I dumped him. The best thing for my eating problems happened, afterward. I found out one of my better friends had been going through exactly the same thing. Literally, actually.
I attached the video she made to my blog post, I am so proud of my friend. She is recovering still, but she helped me on the road to my own. I started eating more, which wasn't much to start. To this day, I cannot finish an entire 10-piece order of Chicken Nuggets from McDonald's. I think the hardest part of my journey of recovery, was when I told my very best friend about my struggle for beauty. I remember telling her, and her holding me IN her arms as SHE cried. She comforted me, while I caused her pain. I felt like such a selfish bastard for what I did to her. I still do. Between those two girls alone, I fought yet another battle. A battle to save myself, the girl they loved. I decided, that I wasn't important to myself, not if I was hurting that many people. I started out by eating a meal a day. Then two. Now, I'm back at three. Sometimes they are small, some are huge. Sometimes, I'll feel so hungry, that I will eat three meals, and snack in between. Bruises still come and go, still unexplained. My weight has stayed at an almost even 100 pounds. These events occurred over this last summer. I am still recovering, finding that I am still missing my strength. Currently, I cannot lift more than about 30 pounds and hold it for very long. I still am afraid to look in the mirror. So, most of the time, I don't. I avoid things that put me back where I was, hurting not only myself, but others as well.

Girls, being beautiful isn't worth this. Be beautiful by being yourself. Don't do what I did. Love yourself, make others accept that.

~From two girls who found the strength in a time of weakness, to save themselves before it was too late. 



More Poetry

Here is more poetry for ya'll. This is more recent poetry... I dedicated it to my ex-boyfriend at the time of our break-up. As time goes on, I feel better now about posting this. I will say that I was really, really angry when I wrote this. He was cheating on me, not to much just a bunch of other pretty awful things that were happening. I think I was within my rights .Haha! At least I am not Taylor Swift, singing about it for the whole world to know.  Here it is:

Leave
Don't stop. Don't stare.
Don't think. Don't care.
Don't about me,
'Cause I didn't for thee.
Stop talking, it mocks.
Time is running out on the clocks.
Your presence is starting to lack.
So please remove your knife from my back.
Leave me. Walk away.
Before my nerves you start to flay.

2012-11-25

Depressing Poetry

Death in the Darkness
By Morgan Griffin
Sitting in a corner, a little girl cries,
Torn in despair, from hideous lies.
Where is she to go from here?
When Death itself, sits oh so near.
Acts of violence leave here wounded,
And the sounds of the living murmured.
A cry of pain escapes her lips,
The knife wounds cross in shallow dips.
Her labored breathing slows,
To the surprise of her malicious foes.
The puddle of blood around her grows,
How much time does she have left? Nobody knows.
 
 

2012-09-10

Without You


Without you, my world could not exist. It would not be altered, but instead I would have entered another planet altogether. Where:
1.       One does not simply dance in the rain.
2.       Where camouflage/hunter’s orange become a trend…..
3.       One cannot whistle while they work.
4.       High school never ends.
5.       The music is all monotones.
6.       To have a summer like Phineas and Ferb is suddenly impossible.
7.       On the other side of the rainbow there is most certainly not a leprechaun. (People!!! We just have yet to        
       discover them!!!)
8.       Where the Library of Congress becomes the only library…
9.       There are guidelines for art.
10.   Free time is instead time you must buy.
11.   Those super freaky dreams we all have occasionally, become reality. (So… that one I recently had  
       about being a bunny…yeah, I now go by Mr. Cuddles)
12.   The viola is the only classical musical instrument… (Imagine… gasp! It seems more tragic all the time!!)
13.   The Sunday newspaper dropped the comic section.
14.   The best plot to a movie is no plot at all.
15.   There is only one flavor of ice cream.
16.   The best clothing is the kind you find at Walmart or Meijer.
17.   Sarcasm is found as often as Latin is spoken.
18.   Your favorite movie is played on loop.
19.   Hamburger Helper is a delicacy.
20.   To live in the suburbs is to live the great American dream.
21.   The best way to travel is not by flu powder.
22.   Natural beauty is a continuous flow of Botox injections.
23.   Matt Smith is not the 11th doctor on Doctor Who. Instead, Zac Efron got casted. (Ew…)

Yet, the worst of all, you wouldn’t be there to see just how bad it really was. 

Photography

A tree.

More tree

Even more

In a galaxy far, far away...
There was this horrendous battle scene.

The winner got a weeping angel, which in turn means she couldn't ever blink again. It really was unfortunate. 

It's true!! Griffins work... :P

The view I got at Tahquamenon Falls
Yeah, I REALLY (in all seriousness) wanted to go swimming.

More of the Falls.

At left, you'll see these gorgeous yellow flowers.

The view off of the Mackinac Bridge, in a moving car. 

My baby!!!! 

Who gave me the look of.. "what the crap?" as I took pictures of her. 

Isn't she purrty?

The best model I have ever had to pose in my pictures... 

Yeah... I told her to look at those flowers... 
My bestest, and gorgeous sister/friend... 
These shots were taken over the summer.

A Growing Ache


Hey,
So I have been gone for some time…. busy with college, and everything else.  I have also been trying to develop a better me. I started this year on a downhill slope. I was terrible to many people… as I tried to help others through situations that I should have just let be. The people who I hurt through those actions were the ones who mattered most. Finally I hit rock bottom… and I stayed there for a little while. It wasn’t till about late June that I decided to become a better person than the one I’d taken on. In August things finally felt the way they should, better in many senses… I was happier.
I forced myself to look back, and try to figure out how such a slope began. It had caused an onslaught of memories… and not entirely good ones. I thought at one point, maybe I’d just hit a rebellious stage in my life, and that it was just something I’d get through on my own.
It wasn’t until one of my friends got herself a boyfriend, did I realize the actual problem. The look on his face when he saw her, and her reactions to every compliment he gave… I discovered a yearning. I wanted such a relationship. Not necessarily the compliments, but to be able to feel that way towards someone. The more I thought about it, the more I’d realized…it wasn’t a recently developed yearning, but a yearning that had surfaced.
Yeah, I’d created a gorgeous image on the outside. I’d also created a monster on the inside.  I asked myself, was it all really worth it? Was finding someone so important that I needed a fake image to do so? Was he really worth it, if he couldn’t accept the real me- unedited? If he did, was he worth losing everyone else? NO. No one will ever be worth that to me. I will never choose between one person and everyone else. The latter will always win. Too many put so much on the line for me, for me to throw them away for a fake personality.
I lost what made me beautiful on the outside, but I gained a sense of inner peace. I thank God that the monster I’d created has disappeared, and hopefully it shall remain that way as I discover true beauty is not how you are seen by others, but how what others have discovered in you.

So, I guess my message through all of this is, is that I’M BACK. Good luck getting rid of me. :P
Thanks for continuing to read…. 

2012-09-02

My poetry...

Okay, so I'll admit... it's true... I write depressing poetry.... A LOT OF DEPRESSING POETRY. Oh well, as long as people keep reading it, I will continue to write it.

Here is one I recently wrote:




Achieving Nothing
As she sat alone, she sat in darkness.
She sat in a pool of despair,
Looking about her in a miserable air.

All that she'd accomplished,
All that she'd done. 
She found little glory, in the hatred she'd won.

Now they'd never trust her,
or care for her affections.
Nor the mildest of her in imperfections.


Hope it's okay... 
Thanks for reading. 

2012-04-25

Draft From Earlier This Month

So... last time I posted, everything in my life seemed to have been going wrong. As a bit of time has progressed, some things have come out to be better. Fascinating... I know.
In all honesty, though, I feel lucky on the developments. That guy I really liked? He's totally like my best friend. Don't worry!!! I don't feel like things have become awkward or anything. My job? Eh... not as bad as before. Things are definitely getting better.

Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of These)

http://grooveshark.com/s/Sweet+Dreams+Are+Made+Of+This/4jflcW?src=5

A new song I have recently discovered from the Sucker Punch soundtrack. Not that I have seen the movie... but I really enjoy remixes. This particular song is remixed off of the original by 'Eurythmics'. Emily Browning sings the remix. Marilyn Manson also did a remix for this song... but I didn't really care as much for it.
Anyways, hope you enjoy!!!